You can do a lot for her: how to help a mother with depression

Depression is a frequent mental disorder, which according to figures from the World Health Organization, affects more than 300 million people in the world, being more common in women than in men. Talking about depression is never an easy thing for those who suffer from it. In the case of mothers it is even more so, because although there is more talk of "real motherhood" every day, it is still expected that mothers will always be radiant with happiness.

But this is not always the case, and many mothers suffer alone while suffering from depression, surrounded by family members who do not know how to support them. That's why today I want to talk to you about the depression of mothers, and how much you can do for them to help them.

Maternal depression: more frequent than we think

We recently shared a recent study, in which they had found that one in five recent mothers hid their doctor suffering from depression or anxiety after childbirth. One of his results showed that the mothers who had a support network were the ones most likely to talk about their depression symptoms.

In Babies and more, seven phrases that you should not say to a mother with depression (and other phrases that you do)

Although saying "one in five" does not seem to be a worrying figure, the truth is that the fact that a mother suffers from depression does have consequences, both for her and for her baby. A study published by the WHO, for example, found that mothers with depression have younger children, and was also associated with stunting in early childhood.

For this and many other reasons, it is important that it be detected early, to treat it and prevent it from transforming into severe depression, which could have really tragic consequences, such as the case of Joe Bingley, which we shared a few months ago.

How to know if someone I know has depression?

Probably the most difficult part of helping someone with depression is that in many cases this can go totally unnoticed for those around them. In the case of mothers, this can happen even more unnoticed, because due to our demanding role as moms, You might think it's just tired or we had a heavier day than usual.

That said, I would like to invite you that you are reading this, that if you have a mother nearby, pay attention to signs of depression. Most of the mothers who suffer from it not only hide it from their doctors, but also from the people around them, because - speaking from my own experience - it is not easy to accept and admit.

How can you help a mother with depression

While it is a sensitive issue, help a mother with depression It is something we can contribute if we know how to act. I share some tips.

Let him know you don't judge him

The problem or impediment that arises to talk openly about depression is that some people consider it a selfish act and even tell you phrases that sometimes only help to make it worse, such as "you have everything to be happy" or "do it for your children , they are the only motivation you need. " But in many cases, fighting depression is much more than saying to herself "I can".

So let her know that you don't judge her and that she is not a bad mother for having depression. Tell him that if he needs help or feels that he cannot do more, he will not be frowned upon or criticized. Your performance as a mother, woman, wife or friend is not defined by a mental disorder for which you need help.

Show him that he is not alone

Depression is very lonely. Being a mental disorder, It is silent, discreet and often invisible. Unlike when we are visibly ill, nobody runs by our side to take care of us when we have depression unless they know or let us know.

When you have a mother close to you who suffers from depression or who you suspect may be going through one, come closer. I may not really want to talk, but it will be very valuable for her to know that she is not alone.

In Babies and more The sincere photos of a mother that show the reality of her fight against postpartum depression

Ask him what he needs

An always genuine, loving and respectful way to help others who are going through a bad time is to offer help. Ask her what she needs and how you can support her. As mothers, we often resist asking for help because of the image of Superwoman or Super Mother that has been created and makes us feel pressured.

Do not try to understand your depression

Sounds like you say you don't ask questions, but on many occasions, there is no clear reason or reason why a depression has occurred. For those who suffer from it, it is difficult to understand what is happening, and it is even more difficult to explain when they ask us questions.

You may not understand how or why a mother has depression, but what you can and should do is help. Be present, ask him how he feels and above all, show him that he has your support and is not alone.