A few months ago, an attitude of my oldest daughter, who was not three years old, began to worry me. When something bothered him, when he was not happy with any decision, sometimes he approached me or his father and hit us, sometimes saying "bad, bad, bad, bad".
I did not understand why she acted like this, giving us those swipes in moments of rage, if she has not seen that behavior in us or in our environment and we do not say that it is "bad." Obviously, they were slapping more fruit of impotence than anything else.
I have read other testimonies of similar moms, worried about "excessive" demonstrations of anger of their children with attitudes that we avoid at all times. Or at least almost always, as I explain below.
Now, after much talking with her, and with some "examples" at school that I fear they have taught her how to paste, she has not repeated that behavior for some time (or when she is going to do it, she stops herself).
We have explained that if parents have never hit her, she should not do it, that we never want to hurt the people we love and that we understand her anger but can never be shown by hitting or saying ugly words.
This whole introduction is to get to a point where, a few days ago, I got a little light that made me wonder Won't we have taught him to hit without realizing it?
I was with my little daughter sitting in her arms, eating, and there was a slight blow to the hand with the singing of the table. Then I acted like so many other times we have done with them, when they hit each other, when they hurt themselves: with the kisses to the painful area and tapping the cause of the pain and saying "bad, bad table".
Haven't you ever said that about “Bad, bad door, bad pupa, bad ground” or something similar, tapping it? An attitude that is sometimes shown to children to "show solidarity" with their pain from the fall or blow and also showing a kind of "revenge" with the object that caused the pain.
I do not know if that will be the cause of my daughter facing us like that in these terms (they are the cause of my pain, my discomfort, because I "come" as I have seen many times), but of course that At that moment I had to think about everything I tell you here.
Of course, now I try not to repeat that action, and before any fall we focus on the “cure priest” of the little ones rather than the “reprimand” to what has caused it. Just in case, I would not like to be teaching you that hitting is normal, without realizing it.
