Kathy DiVicenzo is the mother of two children and has been diagnosed with postpartum depression, anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder. Far from hiding, he has been brave to make a condition that affects many women visible.
Kathy realized that the "ideal life" photos of her Facebook, in which everything was smiles despite being going through a dark moment, did not represent her real life. That's why she was encouraged by her photographer friend Danielle Fantis to do these Sincere photos of a mother that show the reality of her fight against postpartum depression.
It was only enough to publish two photos for a wave of comments to support her. In one of her we see her well dressed, smiling in an orderly room playing with her two children. On the other, the other side of motherhood is shown. We see her in the same room full of toys, messy, shirtless and visibly tired face. In his own words you see "stress, disorder, the days when you count the minutes for bedtime."
He admits that he would only feel comfortable showing one of the two photos (in which it seems that everything is fine), but that the reality, and what she feels about her life, is very different.
In Babies and more Therapy is the most effective way to prevent depression during pregnancy and postpartum"We need to stop assuming that postpartum is always an euphoric stage. For one in seven women it is not."The truth is that both photos represent my life depending on the day. However, I would only share one of these realities comfortably and that is the problem. The only thing more exhausting than having these conditions is to pretend daily that I don't. I work twice as hard to try to hide this reality because I am afraid of making you feel uncomfortable. I'm afraid you'll think I'm weak, crazy, a terrible mother, or a million things that my mind manages to convince me and I know I'm not alone in those thoughts.
We have to start asking the parents of newborns how they are more interested than usual, because the typical "how's it going?" generates the automatic response of "all great!".
An invisible ghost
Photo: Danielle Fantis Photography A woman like Kathy who has just become a mother, who has two small, healthy and smiling children is supposed to be happy and grateful for life, when in reality she feels lonely, tired, frustrated and depressed. You are not a bad mother for not feeling what you should feel, and this causes postpartum depression to become an invisible ghost, which is minimized and in which no one repairs.
If the mother does not feel strong enough to get out of the circle of loneliness imposed by recent motherhood, depression becomes increasingly heavy and she feels that she is slowly disappearing as a person.
In Babies and more Baby blues or mild postpartum depression: why am I sad?If you are going through this stage, you are not alone. Try to connect with other mothers, look for your foster tribe (it is easier to be a mom if you have a tribe). Search for a support network. Talk to your partner, your trusted friends and closest relatives by telling them your feelings and concerns. And if necessary, professional help. They will know how to listen to you, understand you and can give you a hand in what you need so that you feel better and can enjoy your motherhood.
