This morning, Juana Rivas has given her children to the Civil Guard to comply with the judicial order that forced her to return them to her father, Francisco Arcuri. According to El Mundo, the order of the Court of Instruction No. 2 justifies this measure - among other reasons - to avoid the "parental alienation"of the children," given the time they remain under the power of the mother. "
Parental Alienation Syndrome (SAP) is defined by the National Association of People Affected by SAP as "a form of psychological abuse of minor children of a divorce"And it is that in Spain, it is very frequent to hear this term in the courts before cases of contentious divorces. But what is the SAP and how can it affect children?
What is Parental Alienation Syndrome?
According to the guide entitled "Parental Alignment Syndrome" of the Ombudsman for Children, SAP is "a disorder characterized by a set of symptoms resulting from the process by which a parent transforms the consciousness of their children, through different strategies, in order to prevent, hinder or destroy its links with the other parent until it is contradictory with what should be expected of its condition. "
The SAP was first described in the eighties by the American psychiatrist Richard Gadner, who defined it as an emotional disorder that occurs mainly in the field of judicial separation and divorce proceedings.As explained by the National Association of People Affected by SAP, in these processes, Affected children feel and express an unjustified rejection of their father or mother as a direct consequence of the sentimental manipulation promoted by his other parent, to the point that, once established, the child endorses those feelings, intensifies them and extends them to the whole family and social environment of the rejected parent.
Children affected by SAP they grow up in an environment of rejection and rejection on the part of one of its parents (called "alienating parent") towards the other, and situations such as:
They hear from the "alienating parent" negative comments, insults and adjectives that ridicule and affect the image of the other parent
They suffer attitudes on the part of the "alienating parent" that makes it difficult for them to see, communicate or interact with the other parent
The "alienating parent" does not involve the other party in making important decisions regarding the education or health of children in common, so children grow up if the reference of one of their parents.
According to José Manuel Aguilar Cuenca - a psychologist specializing in SAP- in the Ombudsman for Children Guide to which we have referred to the beginning, this emotional abuse that some parents carry out, it can also involve the rest of the family or certain teaching or health professionals, with the aim that all join the smear campaign against the other parent.
How does it affect children? SAP Consequences
Affected children tend to manifest a series of behaviors or feelings that can accompany them throughout their childhood and even tarnish their adult life. Some of these feelings are:
- Anxiety, fear and stress
The fact that the child grows up in an environment and with a parent who speaks continuously badly about the other party, will end up generating anxiety, stress and fear It will certainly affect your emotional development.
It is frequent that the child is nervous when in the presence of the parent He who hears so many negative comments, and may even be afraid of him if the other side has told him stories based on lies with the sole purpose of frightening him and turning him against.
- Feel underestimated in your opinions and feelings
On the other hand, if the minor decides to express to the "alienating parent" his or her opinion or positive feelings regarding the other parent, the former may ridicule or underestimate him for thinking so. Similarly, the "alienating parent" will will reward derogatory or rejection behaviors To the other side.
- I hate one of the parents
The continuous campaign of depressingness carried out by the "alienating parent" will end transforming the child's consciousness, affecting your mental health and fostering feelings of hate that will hinder or destroy the emotional bonds with the other parent.
This will make I ended up taking sides and positioning on the side of the "alienating parent" (the strongest part), rejecting communication and contact with both the other party and that branch of the family.
- Feelings that last in adulthood
As José Manuel Aguilar describes in the opinion article of El Mundo, "They told me you were bad", These negative feelings will accompany the child to adulthood, arriving to suffer anxiety, sadness or compulsive character in their daily life.
Therefore, fathers, mothers, relatives and the children themselves who are or were affected by the absence or lack of prolonged and unjustified relationship of one of their parents, have joined in the National Association of Affected by SAP, with the aim of repair psychological and / or legal damages that this fact may have had in their lives and that in general terms it translates into:
A continued emotional abuse which forces them to think, feel and act according to the whims and desires of an adult.
They are denies the right to have the support and affection of one of his parents and from the other half of his family, unnecessarily placing them in a situation of unjustified orphanhood.
Does SAP exist or does not exist?
There is a wide controversy over if it really exists or not Parental Alignment Syndrome as such, although symptoms may occur in children.
The SAP It is not recognized by the most prestigious scientific organizations, such as the American Psychiatric Association (APA) or the World Health Organization (WHO). It is not included in any edition of the 'Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders' of the APA, nor in the 'International Classification of Diseases' of the WHO, therefore, not consider it as a medical or clinical entity, it is requested that it not be used in the courts if it is not recognized.
But nevertheless, there are several psychologists and jurists in Spain who defend it, as well as the European Court of Human Rights, and even the General Council of Official Associations of Psychologists of Spain issued a statement a few years ago validating it.
The controversy over its recognition is that if the existence of the syndrome is taken for granted, just by testing the symptoms it is assumed that the parent has manipulated the child, skipping a probationary step.
How to bring a respectful divorce
When a couple with minor children divorces, they should know how to take the process of the fmost respectful way possible for the welfare of children, who will continue to need dad and mom separately, just as they needed them when they were together.
To carry out a respectful divorce with children, experts recommend:
Do not talk badly to children about their father / mother: problems should always remain among adults and children should not be put into these issues.
Do not discredit the ex-partner in front of the children.
Allow the children to create a relationship with their father / mother without contaminating it with the prejudices of the other party
However, this is not always the case and unfortunately it is increasingly common to witness divorces in which one of the parents makes continuous denigrating, insulting and negative comments about the other parent in the presence of the children, Gradually educating those children in hatred towards the ex-partner.
If either parent detects symptoms that could indicate manipulation by the other parent, they recommend:
Avoid breaking the bond with the children, since as long as there is a bond with them there will be an open door to dialogue.
Seek professional help to address the problem.
Report the presence of behaviors and strategies carried out by the ex-partner and that prevent or interfere in the relationship with the children in common.
The SAP in Spanish jurisprudence
Frequently, in family courts, psychologists often encounter contentious divorces where there is suspicion of manipulation by one of the parents. Not in vain, the General Council of Associations of Psychologists' Officers catalog this problem as "one of the most complaining issues to both Spanish institutions and the office of the Ombudsman for Children of the Autonomous Community of Madrid".
The General Council of the Judiciary (CGPJ) requested in 2013 that the magistrates cease to use the SAP in the sentences, and the Supreme Court, meanwhile, showed "Deep scientific doubts about the existence of this syndrome and its causes, consequences and solutions".
And it is frequent, as stated by the National Association of People Affected by SAP, that in judicial divorce proceedings concur both complaints of alleged ill-treatment and abuse of a minor, as the corresponding allegations of innocence of the accused and warnings about the manipulations to which the child is being subjected.
Reaching a certain knowledge of what is really happening is not an easy task, so the General Council of Associations of Psychologists' Officers emphasizes the importance of the work of the expert in verifying the facts denounced and substantiating conclusions that ensure, always, for the welfare of the child.
- More information "Parental Alignment Syndrome" Guide of the Ombudsman for Children, National Association of People Affected by SAP
- In Babies and More We divorce: how and when do we tell children according to their age, shared custody as a preferred modality in Spain, is it the best for children ?, Condemned for speaking ill of his father to his son, painful separations where children are the victims, "Helping to go through divorce": a guide for parents
