The way of educating has changed a lot in just one generation. From the generalized authoritarian education decades ago (the one that we receive the majority of adults of today) we have passed to a more democratic education (the ideal one) in which children have a voice and sometimes also vote when deciding according to what things within the family and we have also moved to permissive education (a bomb box that can explode at any time) in which children can do whatever they want, even when they stop respecting others.
As a result, various sectors of education openly ask for a return to the origins to adopt again an authoritarian model that achieves the same as in the past: that children obey and grow submissive to the wishes of their parents, without disturbing and without rebelling.
The last to join this current is Amy Chua, a law professor at Yale University who has recently published a book entitled Battle Anthem of the Tiger Mother in which he explains an educational theory that personally frightens me (and terror), but that for her is superior to that used in the United States (she is Chinese born in the US). As a sample and summary of his theories, here you have 10 of the things he never allowed his two daughters to do:
- Sleep outside the house.
- Participate in network games with other children.
- Participate in a school play.
- Protest for not being in a play of the school.
- Watch TV or play on the computer.
- Choose your own extracurricular activities.
- Take a note below the protrusion (A).
- Not be number one in all subjects (except gymnastics and theater).
- Play an instrument other than the violin or piano.
- Do not play the violin or piano.
The key to success in China
Thanks to these and other strict standards Chinese parents make their children far superior to children in other countries, since they are children with excellent and prodigious notes in fields such as mathematics or music.
According to Chua, 70% of Western mothers believe that the stress of seeking academic success is not good for children and that the important thing is to try to make children see that learning is fun. Chinese mothers, on the other hand, believe that their child may be the best student and that good grades reflect the educational success of parents. In other words, if a child suspends or does not get good grades it is the fault of the parents, who have failed to educate their child well.
Quoting a paragraph from Amy Chua's book:
What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until one does it right. To be good at something you have to work and children themselves never want to work, so it is crucial to ignore their preferences. This often requires strength from the parents, because the child will resist; Things are always more difficult at the beginning, which is when Western parents tend to give up. But, if it is well done, the Chinese strategy produces a virtuous circle. Tenacious practice, practice and practice; That is crucial for excellence; Repetition is undervalued in the United States. When a boy begins to be good at something (be it math, piano, batting or ballet) he or she gets praise, admiration and satisfaction. This builds your confidence and makes an activity fun that was not. This makes it easier for parents to make the child work even more.
Following this comment Amy decided to teach her 7-year-old daughter Louisa to play the piano and took it as a battle in which she would not give in to laziness or compassion. As an example, he explains that when the girl encountered difficulties with a musical piece and after a week of rehearsal, she could not perform it properly, He threatened to give away his toys to the Salvation Army If I didn't get it the next day. The girl did not get it (and I don't know if she carried out her threat). Then he resorted to threatening her without lunch or dinner, without Christmas gifts, without a birthday party and all this after telling her that she was a "lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic".
He says they are not insults, but ways to motivate. He sat with the girl and didn't let her get up or go to the bathroom. After several shouts and threats the girl managed to complete the piece without failures. She felt so happy for the achievement that she didn't want to stop touching her.
This experience made the mother feel convinced that she was following the right path when educating and therefore criticizes that Westerners, for fear of affecting the self-esteem of our children we avoid who discover that they are capable of doing things that they do not believe they are capable of doing
One of his daughters rebelled
What for one of the girls seemed to be an infallible method, since she was docile and (more or less) receptive, for the other girl she did not. The young daughter rebelled to the demands of her mother and she defined her as a challenging girl from her birth with whom she had to fight to break her.
This fight was no problem for the mother, as he explains the Chinese mother is not afraid of being hated by her children, because she feels that she knows what is best for them and that is why she does not attend to their wishes.
What do you think of your book in China
Amy Chua He has not only unleashed controversy in the United States, but also, and this is the most curious thing in China, where he is struggling to change an educational model that puts excessive pressure on children, wreaking havoc on the personality of some of them to the point of taking them to suicide.
